Thursday, August 9, 2012

India - Sri Lanka Series: The Abnormal Analysis !

Another India - Sri Lanka limited overs Cricket series came to an end and India came out winners. They won the ODI series 4-1 and the lone match of the T-20 series. It has already been dissected by everyone from Yahoo to ESPN Crickinfo. So I find no fun in doing it in normal. So here is my 'abnormal analysis' of the series.

The total time Rohit [Nohit] Sharma spent at the batting crease in the 5 matches was no longer than the time Ashok Dinda takes to return to his run up.
The series will seriously be remembered as "The Return of the Pathan" series. Irfan wants to save Tigers but he was definitely too hot for the Lions.

Dhoni believes in the adage "Faith moves mountains". But all his faith failed to get Nohit Sharma's feet moving as he was either bowled or LBW throughout the series.

Manoj Tiwari struggled in the field because he had difficulty in getting rid of the feeling of the bench stuck to his bottom.

The lone T-20 match series had a Man-of-the-match and a Man-of-the-series. And both were different people. They had an award for everyone and only person who didn't recieve an award was Sanjay Manjrekar.

Rohit Sharma should have got the "Best Survivor" award sponsored by Kitply, the termite proof plywood.

Luckily the "T-20 Series" was a one match affair. If this was a 3 match series, the presentation ceremony would have gone on even after the Olympics. 

After the ODI series, I remember Bachchan's famous dialogue to Vinod Khanna in 'Amar Akbar Anthony': "Hey Inspector, tune appun ko bahut maara, appun ne tereko sirf ek maara. Par jo maara woh solid maara, hai ki nahin ?" Sri Lanka won just one match against India's 4. But they won that one match in solid style by chasing India's total in under 20 overs.

What is common between Rohit Sharma and Manmohan Singh ? 'Time' labelled Singh as Underachiever. Time and again Nohit has proved to be Underachiever ! 

The SPCA [Society for Prevention of Cruelty to Animals] might sue Virat Kohli for targeting the Lankan Lions so consistently and brutally.

Zaheer Khan bowled so many wides in the series, it looked as if he was inspired by "Isha Sharvani's Jhalak".

Rahul Sharma's performance was hampered by the 'grass' on the outfield. 

But most important abnormal analysis about the series happened in the Parliament House in Delhi where Sachin Tendulkar demanded that the 'Zero hour' in the parliament be renamed 'Hundred hour' because Zero is inauspicious !

Govind Raj Shenoy for DieHard Cricket Fans

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