The Yumm Yuss Dee Effect!!

They were right when they said, “you never know when it happens.” And what I’ve lately cryptanalyzed is that this saying holds true in case of admiration too.

People ask me “Why do you love Dhoni?” “Why are you always going so gaga about him?”

I have my reasons. Some absolutely logical, and some other, equally illogical, dillogical!

But if you ask me, “When did you begin liking Dhoni?”

I will be tongue tied, for I don’t have an answer.

Maybe when he along with his long locks obliterated the Sri Lankan attack, that awestrucking 183*. Maybe when he gave the ball to Uthappa in the India-Pak ball out. Or maybe when he took of his jersey after winning the WC of the shortest format.

Whatever the reason maybe, it ensured that I was enslaved. And enslaved for keeps.

Yes I follow Mahendra Singh Dhoni. I follow him not to strike a note about his stats and records or to call him “lucky.”  I do not follow him to debate about he being the best Indian Captain, for I know that he incontrovertibly is. But I follow him, ‘cause for me he’s a synagaogue of idealness. A perfect cricketer, and more than that, a perfect human being.

Calm, ice-cool, composed. Planning scrupulously, wangling insidiously and striddling the opposition like an edacious beast of prey. Bogusing a brine of phlegm amidst tempestuous storms. An wellspring of sagacity, amidst the gore. The calming dominion in Indian Cricket.

That’s what he is to me.

I wonder what my cardiograph looks like when he’s taking strike. Those who get a chance to watch him with me being in the same room, can figure out three different forms of me in the post-hitting moments 1) a girl admiring and being awed by the alacritous runner between the wickets; 2) a wacko caterwauling “Oh, boy!” at the top of her lungs with both hands up in the air, if the ball crosses the ropes; 3) and, a leaviathan springing, throwing expletives at the air if the ball takes one beautiful flight and kisses the sky.

You might be charmed to see a MJ moonwalk, or a Madhuri Dixit dance straight from  the 90s. I will be beguiled to see a MS Dhoni sideways dive. Or for that matter, even a flash of his pearly whites.

Having talked of MSD’s antics, I am so cajoled and can’t stonewall the fire in belly to talk about Champions Trophy as well.

Putting the dumb in a dumbfounding decision, when it was dreaded that in the battle of common sense vs. ICC, common sense might just retire hurt, fortunately, cricket overshadowed the stupidity.

Yes, Shikhar Dhawan played well, Virat Kohli batted elegantly, Jadeja came a long way, from internet jokes to the golden ball, and Ashwin bowled as if he never really left home; but among all these spine-tingling performances, MS Dhoni’s was heart-stirring like none other’s. How tiring it should be to scrunch balls, keep wickets and simultaneously, make strategies for eleven people? But Mahendra Singh Dhoni, like a warrior, never halts in the battle.

Champions Trophy: A Clinical Victory for the Mustache !

 25 June 2013, is the right day to write about 23 June 2013 because it was 30 years ago on this day that Cricket became a religion for me and we subsequently found a God. We have discussed million times about 25 June 1983 and 2 April 2011 and about the T-20 World cup win. Today, it is about what was it about the Champions Trophy win !

It was a clinical performance by Team India and that was established by the uniform they wore during the victory celebrations.

Performance with Clinical Efficiency !

Performance with Clinical Efficiency !

Here is a list of people and attributes that contributed towards Indian win in the Champions Trophy.

Sir's Magic

It Ain’t Over…

“One does not move during overs…”

I know what you’re thinking. It must have taken something deeply significant for my column to spring back into life after nearly a year with seemingly nothing to say for myself, right? Well, no – not quite. For six of you who read this, it might seem like a pretty small issue. For the remaining three of you, it may strike a chord – a C# Minor in fact – and we may be in agreement. Who knows! I certainly don’t… that’s quite evident!

BCCI's "Operation Clean-Up"

After a scandal-hit IPL, which brought terms like "spot-fixing", "conflict of interest", "step aside", "betting" et al to the limelight, BCCI has finally woken up from its slumber. The Board which currently is more involved in internal politics and self-preservation than the functioning of the game has come up with a 12-point "Operation Clean-up" to clear IPL's image. And maybe hope to get the game's credibility also back up.

Following are the 12 points announced by the interim management (Source: Times of India). My thoughts on each are appended

1. Removal of sleaze; no cheerleaders, no after-match parties for players and support staff.Seriously, this is the first point they come up with. As a cricket fan, I do not really care if they remove cheerleaders and ban after-match parties, but shows the messed up priorities. Good step though.

The ICC Champions Trophy History (and Preview)

So here we are in England for the last edition of the ICC Knockout / Mini World Cup / ICC Champions Trophy / Thing.

This is a strange little tournament purposely offset in between the 'real' fifty over world cups, designed to be a quick-smart affair all over in a couple of weeks (take note IPL). However fifty over cricket must die according to the powers that be, and the idea has now been thrown out and we won't see it again.

I'm going to disagree with the majority and say that I like the tournament. This would be the only other time that all the leading teams of world cricket will be assembled.  That was until the rise of T20 cricket came along and demanded its own little World Cup, and the other problem is that a couple of the tournaments did suck and slipped in and out of memory without much of a second thought.  Here's hoping for a memorable showing in the next fortnight to resurrect interest.

Let's have a quick look at its history:

1998 - South Africa Finally Wins Something
... and it's the only cricketing tournament they have ever won. There was a Tendulkar pummelling that eliminated Australia, but apart from that it was a pretty ho-hum affair.

2000 - The Cairns Show
India were on a nice roll courtesy of a pair of Ganguly tons and young renegades on debut namely Yuvraj Singh and Zaheer Khan, both of who were responsible for again dismantling Australia in the quarter final. The script was set for India, but they hit a roadblock in the form of a "how did they get this far anyway" New Zealand team.  Chris Cairns fired one of his few shots as a gun batsman, and stomped all over a lazy Indian performance in the final.

I remember that day because it was one of those rare occasions the patented Fleming Frown disappeared, at least for a while.

"Why couldn't I be Australian". © Getty