Series preview: England vs India

By this time tomorrow, the first Test will be afoot at Lord’s. If you’ve fallen into the hype-moat surrounding this series (who hasn’t, really, except for one or two continents), then surely you must believe that this will be the best, most competitive Test series since the legendaryWest Indies v India saga of 2011.

There’s every reason to lock yourself up with a TV, laptop, carbs in any form, and another TV (for weather reports): the #1 ranking at stake, Sachin’s 100th 100 (possibly first at Lord’s) followed by 10,000 (give or take 17) articles about his career, WAGs in the stands, and two most enticing matchups:

1) Pie-chucker meets Pie-lover

They're from different backgrounds, literally

2) Man with a sweet tooth

He'd trade a cow for those beans to know what the beanstalk would look like

Anyway, playtime’s over. Time to move on the technical stuff. The real nitty-gritty. Squeaky bum time. Release the kraken. Right.

India’s practice game may have suffered at the hands of rain and Somersetian (Somerian? Somartian?) batsmen, but it actually answered pretty much all the questions related to selection and form. If you accept that you really shouldn’t be asking about Dravid, Sachin or Laxman at this point, it’s all good. Gambhir andMukund got runs on the board in their unbeaten second-innings partnership, Raina cemented his place in the best way possible, Sreesanth bowled himself out of contention.

India doesn’t have to face Willoughby and Thomas, however; England’s pace attack is far superior and much improved since the last time the two teams met. Having said that, India’s batsmen already have one start-of-tour batting collapse out of the way, and there won’t be too many gifts from them, not even with aSehwag-sized crater at the top of the order. Based on what I’ve seen, Mukund is a nervous starter, but once he’s in he looks very assured. (Trivia: When was the last time India had two lefties open?)

India’s bowling, like on the last English tour, looks like it could use the conditions well - Zaheer Khan is the best left-arm quick in the world at the moment, and Praveen Kumar can get prodigious swing with the new ball. Ishant Sharma just needs to bowl the way he was doing a couple of weeks ago. Harbhajan might fancy himself if he gets bouncy pitches, but this England side won’t be as vulnerable to spin as it used to be, especially when they have the luxury of Swann bowling to them in the nets.

Probable XI: Gambhir, Mukund, Dravid, Tendulkar, Laxman, Raina, Dhoni (c)(wk), Harbhajan, P. Kumar, Zaheer, Ishant.

England have a superb chance to get an early lead in the series with Sehwag out. Their batsmen have been accumulating runs for a while - Cook, Trott, KP and Bell filled their boots against a toothless Lankanattack. Strauss made merry in the practice game and Prior is in good domestic form, but it won’t be as easy against India. Complacency, and a lack of recent quality opposition could get in their way.

Their bowling, however, is in great shape. Jimmy “Jimmy”Anderson and Chris “freakystringbean” Tremlett will cause plenty of problems when on song. Put either under pressure, though, and… well, we’ll see when Sehwag’s back. Broad will be eager (and under severe, debilitating, acne-inducing pressure) to pick up wickets and stop his Test career from following his ODI career with running shoes on (What?). AndSwann’s there too. See what I did there? I don’t.

Probable XI: Strauss (c), Cook, Trott, Pieterson, Bell, Morgan, Prior (wk), Swann, Broad, Anderson, Tremlett.

Official-looking prediction: Draw. 100th Sachin ton. Both batting sides will stumble. Mukund ton. Broad will take 2-3 wickets. Tremlett will take more. I’ll be slightly wrong about something and very wrong about something else.

Rishabh Bablani for DieHard Cricket Fans

India vs England – Series Preview

With the Australian aura disappearing quicker than bottled water during the Y2K, there have been two teams that have thrust their hands up like eager school children to claim the number one throne. These two teams are due to clash, providing what promises to be a showpiece cricketing tour that will rekindle the dwindling interest we are seeing these days. The series, is England versus India, and while I believe both are nowhere near the quality of the Australian empire, it promises to be a mouth watering clash nonetheless.

Not this sort of watering we hope. © Getty Images

But lets make one thing absolutely clear, the second half of that tour will be nothing but dribble. England are a woeful limited overs outfit, evidenced by a narrow victory over a Murali-less Sri Lanka, and an awful World Cup campaign that left foot prints planted smartly into pant seats. Despite the grubby Indian outfit barely managing a series victory in the West Indies, a full strength Indian outfit should be far too much here.

Let us focus then on the test matches, where the real juice lies.

The Best English Team In Decades?
The English have seemingly forever been a horror story of cricket. They always had the players, and appeared to have turned the corner in the 2005 ashes, only to be sucked again into the familiar abyss of failure with the 5-0 ashes drubbing that followed that. But then the clouds began to clear, probably a lot to do with the Australian decline, and England started have finally getting consistent results. Gone is the Flintoff-or-nothing approach, the blaming on injuries and coaches, the dodgy selections, the idiotic notion that Harmison and Panesar were match winners.

Pictured: England's 2003 Test Team. © Getty Images

Suddenly here is a team without an apparent weakness, a bold and clinical leader and capable depth waiting in the wings. All the ledgers are in balance, they have staunch openers, an attacking and consistent middle order, a varied seam attack almost equal to the 2005 Ashes quartet, a real keeper batsman, and the best spinner in the world. Emulating Australia is a definite possibility with this team.

Are The Bollywood Cricketers Up To It?
India may be the highest ranked test side in the world, but a lot of that credit belongs to the Laxman one-man crusades saving them from what would have been dead set defeats. Has that get-out-of-jail card run out of steam? Laxman aside however, a full strength top order reads Sehwag (if not injured), Gambhir, Dravid, Sachin, Laxman, Yuvraj, Dhoni. That is some seriousbatting, even despite that fact that Dhoni is usually fodder in seaming conditions. But don’t forget also that most of these men haven’t seen cricket since the IPL, and haven’t seen real cricket since the World Cup.

Not quite the match practice we had in mind.© AFP

The bowling unit has the wile of Zaheer Khan, easily their bowling trump card, and the rediscovered mojo of Ishant Sharma. India will rely heavily on these two, but despite that Munaf can also be useful in seaming conditions if he gets it right, and despite joining the 400 club, India will benefit from playing Mishra instead of Bhajji. Harbhajan is ample proof that the modern game will skew numbers, he is nowhere near the historical 400 club in quality.

The Differences
Virender Sehwag is the only player immune to bowling conditions. If the wickets tumble which is very likely, he will be a key figure in turning an egg faced 150 into a modest 250.

Chris Tremlett the Terminator had Tendulkar missing everything the last time India toured, and thanks to some long overdue consistent selections, he is firmly in place to wreak some serious havoc. He has all the tools, pace, bounce, presence and most of all, control. He is the real Harmison.

Sarah Conner would have no chance. © Getty Images

The Prediction
The most hilarious thing is watching both these sides pretend to be Australia. There is a plethora of swagger to be had from both sides, both believing that they have earned the crown to be labelled number one in the world. Untrue, as the pillar known as Australian cricket tumbled with old age, it wasn’t defeated. Albeit a notch down, these are two very even teams.

An important factor is that England are at home, and India should expect seaming conditions which could undo them. Add to that a lack of match practice for most of the top order and their chief architect Zaheer Khan. England have come off a thorough mauling of Sri Lanka, while India, fielding a B side, looked scrappy and bored against a poor West Indies outfit. Given these crucial factors, England has the edge.

Contributed By : Varun Prasad
Original Post : The Cricket Musings

The Sourav Ganguly Chart

Many moons ago from this week, the man who would soon to be known as the Prince Of Calcutta was born (or Kolkata if you prefer). By numbers alone he was more than a solid cricketer, particularly in the ODI game, numbers also say he had a distinguished career as the Indian captain and can even be credited as the man who turned it all around by doing a Ranatunga and giving his troops a backbone.

And yet, opinion on him is so divided. Labelled as pretentious, smug, selfish, and i’m sure our old friends Greg Chappell and Martin Crowe probably have choice words that I will not divulge in this family friendly forum. Hardly has there been such a polarized view on a pivotal figure in our recent cricketing history, how has this come to be?

I present you…

Each phase in the Ganguly history can be explained accurately:

Ganguly 0.1 (Beta)

© AFP

The fresh faced Ganguly didn’t waste any time making an impression, carving up England with a debut century and never really looking back. A lot of people don’t realize the value he gave the ODI team, particularly since Tendulkar was comparatively low in the late nineties. Ganguly feasted on the runs with great consistency and with the minimum of fuss, most of these centuries resulting however in lower order collapses and therefore going unnoticed. There was no question however that as long as Ganguly was there at the top, at least one hole in the batting equation was nicely patched up.

Ganguly 1.0

© Getty Images

With the departure of the disgraceful Azharuddin and a failed run for Tendulkar, Captain Ganguly was born. Backing the then young Yuvraj Singh, Harbhajan, Zaheer Khan and others, Ganguly helped forge a side that was at least capable of competing with the best of them. His captaincy style was aggressive and bold, and liked or not, he did take a young team and get them noticed, none more famously with his counter-attacking 144 against Steve Waugh’s Aussies in Brisbane. He was also there when Bhajji and Laxman ended the Australian record test run in 2001 and their 2003 World Cup run to confirm they were the number three side in the world (behind space and Australia).

But at a price. His batting fell away, none more spectacularly against New Zealand in the 2002/03 tour. The Ganguly standard codes of dismissals was written at this stage:

1. The Wet Bat – Hanging the willow out to dry for the slips to gobble up. If a naughty slipper did drop one, rest assured more came.
2. The Stump Destroyer – The wickets sponsors would have been laughing all the way to the bank as the off stump flew around gloriously with late cuts from France or China, take your pick.
3. The Straight Up – While he did manage to crunch a few short balls around, if it wasn’t a six, it was a spoon straight up, a dead set dolly which even Kamran Akmal couldn’t fake.
4. The Suicide – And when all else failed, the suicidal run out. Not just any run out, a run out by country miles as Ganguly would jog past stumps smashed five seconds ago.

Thanks to him munching away on the likes of Kenya and Namibia, his record never reflected it, but this was when the Crowe’s and the Chappell’s began gunning for his head and replacing it with Dravid’s. Words flew around, fingers were pointed, and eventually Ganguly was gone, seemingly to the same place Kambli and Prabhakar went.

But alas!

Ganguly 2.0

© AFP

Around a year later emerged a fellow resembling only in appearance to the Ganguly’s of the old. With a slightly tweaked technique, gone was the easy ball creaming of the beta version and the minnows-only 1.0 version, he came back solid, bloody minded, and ready to put a bounty on his wicket. No freebies here, as he saw off the good balls, and put away the bad ones, not with pomp, but with purpose.

He soon became the most reliable ODI opener they had, and a solid middle order presence in tests, offering a nice blend of class and experience. But that wasn’t the telling difference, it was that this Ganguly didn’t get in the faces of the opposition, the public or the administrators. He quietly went about his way under different captains, minding his own business and paying attention to his batting and fielding. When he was dropped from the ODI side, he was their most consistent, but was at least allowed a glorious test exit.

A remarkable change in attitudes in a remarkable career, one of the few players who went through a true metamorphosis as the years rolled by. He should be remembered fondly for his contribution, as be it through his bat or mouth, he help lay the groundwork for what the Indian team is today.

Contributed By: Varun Prasad
Original Post: The Cricket Musings

Crick-Veda: Oldest Chronicle on Gentleman’s Game !

Disclaimer: I don’t belong to RSS / VHP / Bajrang Dal. I am not right-wing Hindu extremist. I am not Francois Gautier. I am not Gurumoorthy. I am notManoj Kumar. Neither am I Akshay Kumar. I am not a devotee of any Baba including Sai Baba, Rahul Baba, Baba Ramdev and Baba Black sheep. I am not related to any Thakre; living on nonliving. My surname isn’t Togadia. I have no religion except Cricket. I don’t believe in God, but I believe in Rahul Dravid and I have seen Sachin Tendulkar. The nearest I have felt to divinity was when I saw VVS Laxman on drive Shane Warne through mid-wicket at Eden in 2001. And I believe Virendar Sehwag can save us from Satan by just Upar Cutting him. This post is a work of fiction but that should not be a reason to disbelieve it.

Breaking News… Breaking News… Breaking News…

Cricket is Indian by Origin !

This sensational discovery has rocked the world today and will be remembered as aRed-Letter day. This will change forever, all hitherto held beliefs about Cricket in general and the mankind in particular. During a routine excavation in some undisclosed place in Uttar Pradesh, the ASI has found a huge treasure. That alone wouldn’t be so special or sensational. But they have found out a new dimension in the form of a book named Crick-Veda [Krikveda for the Swadeshi brigade], believed to be the long lost and forgotten fifth Veda.

Carbon dating and all kind of authentication tests are being held on this voluminous epic. It is believed to be at least 8000 – 9000 years old. Experts are busy deciphering the text. You are reading this here first because of our close contacts with ASI. Dr. Balls is an insider in ASI and has contacts from bottom to top. Here are some of the salient aspects about the book, brought only to those who follow Doctoring the Balls !!!

What we are going to disclose here is established beyond doubt in this priceless piece of Cricket Testament, ODIment and T-20ment, all compiled together. Cricket was a game, a religion and a way of life in India. It was called Kri karet, which means ‘Doing the work’.

It was work as well as worship for the people of India that was Bharat. This emphatically proves Cricket was not a British game as has been claimed so far. Almost every Indian will vouch for this. The British picked up this beautiful game from India just like they picked up spices. We now know why Cricket is so spicy.

Cricket, was played in North Indian heartlands and South Indian paddy fields. The boys and men running in the fields tilled the land [Kri Khet in Hindustani and Kriya Kshetrain Sanskrit] and thus prepared it for watering and subsequent cultivation of crops. This must the earliest known example of business with pleasure. They worked while they played and they played while they worked. What a revolutionary ancestors did we inherit from ! And many people believe Cricket is a lazy game, rubbish !

The extremely talented men of those days used to hit the ball very hard and long and then people used to go in search of the ball. That is how the coinage “Leather hunt” evolved.

Hanumaan was the first ever Cricket-fever stricken boy known from history. He thought the red and shining Sun was a Cricket ball and went to catch it and this evolved into a legend. People misinterpreted it and said he went to pluck a fruit. Absolutely baseless and ball-less. Just look at this illustration, the Sun looks exactly like a Cricket ball shining in the Sun ! And Hanumaan is clearly trying to pick a one handed catch out of thin air. He isn’t plucking any fruit out there.

Catch it !

Why did Krishna slay Kaliya the snake ? Because Kaliya refused to return the ball. Krishna and his friends were playing Cricket [Kri Karet in those days] by the Yamuna river bank. A DLF maximum from Krishna went into the river and Kaliya refused to return the ball. Thus their game of Cricket was halted by the mean snake. Hence Krishna had no other option but to slay the stubborn and spoilsport Kaliya to retrieve the ball to continue the game before the Umpires declared bad light. Even today we don’t like to be disturbed while we enjoy our Cricket. Be it the snake or the wife.

In one of the most touching chapters, Sage Krikshwamitra explains the relation and differences between Test Cricket, One Day Cricket and T-20 Cricket. He says, T-20 Cricket is like your little daughter. You love her because she is your daughter. She may do childish things and appear juvenile. But you love her because she is your own product. But you have very little chances of recovering lost ground if your daughter gets spoiled, just like T-20 Cricket match. T-20, like your little girl is damn popular with people of all ages because you can carry it around with ease and you won’t feel bad if she pees on your laps.

One Day Cricket is like the wife. You can play during day or at night. She is mature, beautiful, enticing and enchanting. You can control a lot of things with her. But you can’t keep her switched on forever. Like every wife, she can be demanding. You need to do a lot of running around and be prepared to lose her if your fail with the bat or the ball. Most importantly she is more entertaining at night after you are done with all the work. She comes with a lot of color and cheer.

Test Cricket is without doubt, the Mother. You respect her, revere her, love her and listen to her. You can even fall asleep in her lap and still not miss much. She can go on and on and on for days sounding like a bore. But in the end, you are wiser, stronger and winner if you do the listening and playing properly. Like Mother, Test Cricket gives you more than one chances. Nor one bad over, neither a single bad shot can lose it all for you. And you better show discipline with your Mom, else you will be routed by the forces that guard the earth.

Further evidence from present day analogies: From aesthetics of the variants of the game, Crick Veda moves to the weapons used. The ball was the weapon of the aggressor. The bat belonged to the more responsible defenders. It symbolizes how one can use a weapon for both defensive and offensive purposes. So typically Indian. We just have to look at how Rahul Dravid and Virendar Sehwag use the same weapon to different effects.

India has a tradition of stretching beyond the limits and breaking records. Ram broke the Shiv Dhanush. Sachin has been breaking records ever since he was born. Arjun hit the fish’s eye to win over a girl. Yuveraj hits the bill-boards. Karna was the first to show how one can use own body parts as defense tools. Mohindar Amarnath followed suit when he took on all the bouncers on his body without flinching. Krishna said it was fair to be unfair to deal with an unfair enemy. Saurav Ganguly was just equally mean to Australians. There are innumerable revisits.

Let us look at different aspects of the game. Batting was a Royal occupation. They never liked to run. Indian batsmen still don’t like to run. Ask Sehwag, Pathan and Yuvi. Bowlers were the Soldiers. They attacked and won over enemies by felling the opponents. Do soldiers get any better than Bhajji, Kumble, Zaheer and Kapil Dev ? Fielding was for kids and the labor workers. Even today, the young and the fringe players field. The rest just rest.

Kri Karet expert from history and the earliest known Sexologist Batsayana has elaborated on the attraction between the Kri Karet Players and the girls and women from the entertainment fields. The singers, actors and dancers of the yore had a very special and enduring liking for the talented and good looking players.

There were so many affairs, courtships and marriages between Kri Karetars and artisans. Urvashi fell for Arjun’s looks as well as skills. Seeta, the Princess was bowled over by the record breaking abilities of Ram. Bheem’s ability to wield the mace [the first ever Mongoose] won over Hidimba. Nothing has changed in India 8000 years since.

There are millions of illustrations, coaching manuals and extensive records mentioned in Krikveda. We just have provided a sample here. But we promise to come back with entire translation sooner than later. Till then keep pondering over the points mentioned here.

Can all this old world wisdom in Cricket be anything but Indian ?

QED: Cricket is Indian by Origin !

Govind Raj Shenoy for DieHard Cricket Fans

The BCCI vs The DRS – The Height of Arrogance

Its not old news that our friends at the BCCI continue to utterly refuse the DRS system, their secretary saying as much once more yesterday. The previous reaction from most of the world including myself would be to shake our heads in annoyance, probably mutter a few profanities under our breath (quietly), and get on with life. Today it is different however, today I am compelled to dig deeper, perhaps get an understanding of the psyche behind all this, is there a motive underneath it all?

If this picture was the DRS run on the BCCI decision, they would call this one not out despite the evidence, just because they can.

Let us try to formulate reasons as to why this ridiculous situation is with us:

Because Sachin And MS Say So
The two most powerful figures in Indian cricket, possibly all cricket, possibly all of India, claim that the technology is not 100% accurate. Perhaps the BCCI is no more than just a spineless extension of their voices? In that case, who are Tendulkar and Dhoni to make a critique on the DRS technology? Its like a McDonald’s cashier having the power to stop them selling coke because he doesn’t agree with the level of fizz. There is usually a players association present, a body that is supposed to be representative of the players, I haven’t heard a squeak from them, if there even is one.

Because The Secretary Says So
Our friend the BCCI secretary, N. Srinivasan, claims boldly that they are a “structured organization” who “make their own decisions”. Lets back track a second, who on earth is N. Srinivasan to be the judge on this? Does he even have a cricketing background? He is anindustrialist from Chennai, who is he to be the face of the BCCI? As far as I am concerned he is no more qualified to make these statements than Queen Latifah. If there really was a structured organization, the players association would answer to him, and he would answer to the ICC. In a land where money talks, this is what happens.

Common sense was not in the job description.

Because The ICC Don’t Say A Word
Srinivasan is the secretary for the Indian cricket board, not world cricket. He should have absolutely no say in this matter, yet as always there is a deathly silence from the so called governing body of world cricket. There needs to be a China mentality here, the ICC should be in charge, period. The sad reality of it all is that the ICC is merely a curtain, a faded doormat for one nation’s selfish cricket board. In a recent survey, 94% of players agree that ICC does not act in the best interests of cricket, and 69% agree that the BCCI has an unfair influence on the ICC. The people are not blind, only the people at the top are.

Because The DRS Is Not Accurate
The big argument is that they cannot guarantee 100% accuracy and therefore the system is invalid. This is an unbelievably idiotic statement. Imagine you were making a return on investment, “yes yes we know that you can give me a nine dollar return on average, but you can’t guarantee me ten dollars! Therefore I will settle for fifty cents. And so will the rest of the world because I said so”. Physics, mathematics and statistics, the very foundations of our scientific knowledge are based on assumptions. Why do unlike poles attract and like poles repel? They just do, the same way the BCCI repels intelligence.

And So What Happens From Here?
As usual. Nothing.

Contributed by DHCF: Varun Prasad
Original Post : The Cricket Musings

The Doppelgangers – Part IV

Former Zimbabwean All Rounder Grant Flower and Neil Patrick Harris (Barney from How I met Your Mother)

If you come across more doppelgangers, send us your entry and we will include it next time around.

Contributed by DHCF Naman Kheria